THE LYCEUM
"IT is the lawyer’s daughter,
And she is grown so dear, so dear,
She costs me, in one evening,
The income of a year!
’You ca’n’t have children’s love’, she cried,
’Unless you choose to fee ’em!’
’And what’s your fee, child?’ I replied.
She simply said-
"We saw ’The Cup’." I hoped she’d say,
"I’m grateful to you, very."
She murmured, as she turned away,
"That lovely [Ellen Terry.]
"Compared with her, the rest", she cried,
"Are just like two or three um-
"berellas standing side by side!
"Oh, gem of-
"We saw Two Brothers. I confess
To me they seemed one man.
"Now which is which, child? Can you guess?"
She cried, "A-course I can!"
Bad puns like this I always dread,
And am resolved to flee ’em.
And so I left her there, and fled;
She lives at-
1881.